When There Just Isn’t Enough

What do you do when life hands you hard hand? When you can’t trade in your cards, and those lemons aren’t even good enough for lemonade?

What do you do when you’re out of energy? When you’re out of time? Chances? Options?

When you’re lonely, exhausted, or afraid? When you have nothing left?

What do you do?

We are all handed hard things. It’s tempting to compare our hard things with others, whether we’re trying to make our own situation look worse compared to others, or feeling worse because “So-and-so has this big, hard thing, and I can’t even handle my little hard thing.” Those things don’t matter as much as the fact that we do go through our own rough patches, and we all have to learn how to overcome our own (not someone else’s, but that’s a post for another day).

My recent hard thing was when my husband left for Air Force Boot Camp and further military training. In total, he would be gone for 11 months, living in three different states. Having myself and my toddler go with him wasn’t a great option for us, considering that I was also pregnant. Between the time he left and the time my toddler and I went to stay with my parents was only a few weeks, but they were some of my hardest three weeks. On top of the crazy emotions of military separation with no contact, I was so sick I couldn’t eat (thanks to the pregnancy), trying to sell an apartment, coordinating a cross-country move, and still taking college classes. Oh, and I had to keep my toddler alive and at least somewhat happy and grounded in all this. I was exhausted.

In a book I was reading, I came across a suggestion to find people in the scriptures who you can relate to. After some pondering, I decided to study more about the widow of Zarephath who fed the prophet Elijah (for the full story, read 1 Kings 17:10-16). Now I know that my situation could not compare to that of a widow who—on top of everything else—had to provide financially too. Who couldn’t count on help to come or a husband to return. Who couldn’t even put food on the table. But if her flour was energy and her oil was time, I could relate. She’s running out and feeling hopeless. Helpless. And very alone.

Then along comes the prophet, and he asks her to cook something for him. I used to thing that I’d never comply with that request if a stranger showed up at my door in a time like that. Excuse me? Make you a cake? My kid and I are literally starving, and you want to take the very last of it? No sir, go find yourself someone else.

But now I think that she must have known. No mother would take food out of her child’s mouth unless she knew something that Elijah never said. That he was a prophet of God, and if the prophet asked, it must be important. So she trusted his promise that there would be enough. She made that cake. She gave the Lord, through His servant, the very last of what she had. How amazed must she have been when the Lord gave her more than she had before, and she never ran out!

Those few weeks when I was alone, I was emotionally exhausted, spent, and never seemed to have enough time for everything. I was also asked to serve. Given a calling. Reminded that I ought to be doing family history and temple work. And one Sunday morning I said, “No. I can’t do it. Not this week. I have too little energy and not enough time. There isn’t enough.”

But then I remembered those who had less than me and gave what they had. So I gave, too. My toddler’s Sunday naptime went to my calling and doing some family history. And miraculously, she napped much longer than usual so I had time to rest. My sister-in-law randomly called to offer babysitting on her day off so I could go to the temple. I have felt the Spirit whisper peace and strength to get me moving when I didn’t have the energy to do the next task.

And I never ran out. My strength and capacity and time, like the cruse of oil, never failed.

So what do we do when life hands you a hard hand? When you’re out of energy, time, or options? When you have nothing left?

You take what you do have, as little as it is, and give it to the Lord. You act with the faith that there will be enough, and that He won’t let you run out of oil either.